I was just chatting with a friend of mine who is spending some time in Pine Apple, Alabama.  I’ve never been to Pine Apple, but I learned alot about it on the Internet:

Me: So where the hell are you, anyway?

A: In a trailer next to the woods directly behind the clinic.

Me: In Pine Apple, AL.

A: Please don’t say anything scary.  Seriously.

Me: I would never do that.  I have my dog here, to keep me company.  Whenever I get scared, I just put my hand under the bed and she licks it until I feel better.

A: Dammit Josh.  You fucker.

Me:  What?  I’m trying to be comforting.  It looks like Pine Apple is pretty far from the beach.

A: Yes, it is.

Me: Not really close to anything- Montgomery, maybe?  I’ve never been there.

A: Closer to Montgomery.

Me: It’s so strange.  Who would have thought that Pine Apple would be right down the road from the Alabama State Mental Hospital for the Criminally Insane?   Google Maps has all sorts of useful information.

A: You are such an asshole.

Me:  I think Mt. Morah Road cuts through an ancient Indian burial ground.

A: Jackass.

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